“Well, the other day I was talking to my friend Barbara. You remember Barbara, right? She told me how all her friends were reading this book Fifty Shades of Gray. I was so offended. I couldn’t believe she was telling me about it. She thinks just because she’s rich she knows things I don’t. What! Does she think I live under a rock? Fifty Shades of Gray! Is it possible to miss it? So I said to her, ‘Thank-you, Barbara, but I’ve already read it and I was totally appalled. My daughter can write so much better than that!’
“Have you thought about going into the pornography field, sweetie? You’d be very good at it. You always had quite an imagination.”
Um… thanks for the support Mom. And I wonder why I feel like I didn’t get good career advice as a kid. At least she’s gotten off my hips.